Tai Ji Men Qigong Academy

Dad, I Understand Your Intention

My father was a solider. The impression he gave me since I was little was that he was cool, serious, and lofty. Since my father’s troop was deployed in an island off the coast of Taiwan, the only memory I had about him when I was growing up was his rigorous parenting style and high expectations for us. Except the words "strict" and "cool," I almost didn’t have any other impression about him.

Since my father was often away from home, only my mother, brother and I lived together most of the time. Whenever my father was off duty and came back home, we always felt pressured with him around due to his serious personality. I didn’t dare to joke or share my opinions about anything when I was with him.

After my father retired from the military, he works as a salesman. One day when he was doing his job, he was accidentally hacked by a stranger from behind. As soon as we received this news, my mom took my brother and me to the hospital. Looking at my father lying on the hospital bed, I then realized deeply that "father" is very important for me. Since then, the relationship between my father and me started to change subtly.

When I accompanied my father to do physical therapy, I really admired the strong life force he displayed. In the beginning, he couldn’t remember anything, so he began to learn phonics slowly. Even though he can’t move easily now, he can fix computers, set up networks, and do other things for his customers. He is even my younger brother and my first computer teacher. Although my father and I deeply know how important we are for each other, we woruld sometimes bicker over very small things due to our each other’s bad tempers.

When I was in tenth grade, I was fortunate to join the big family of Tai Ji Men. That was the most important turning point of my relationship with my father. Because of the guidance of Shifu and the sharing of Tai Ji Men dizi, I learned the importance of good communication and positive thinking. I began to express my ideas to my father, and gradually we have become able to talk to each other nicely.

Now I finished my mandatory military service and have started to work. My father’s temper is better than before, but sometimes he still doesn’t change his military style when he talks. He wants me to know that he is right by a commanding tone of voice and bossy attitude. Of course he still doesn’t say anything to show his purpose. However, after practicing qigong for years at Tai Ji Men, an ancient menpai of qigong and martial arts, I have learned to show respect to the elders and conduct myself in an honorable way. I no longer escape or reject him, but learne to appreciate the love of a father toward his son. I have learned to use my heart to understand him-his strict teaching is to benefit me.

Shifu has taught us the meaning of a Chinese character "qin"(closeness.) It means that people feel close to each other when they see each other’s hardships. Now, my "military father"and I can naturally watch TV, chat, share life stories, go shopping, and go to the movies together. This is what I did not dare to think about before! Understanding the meaning of "closeness" allows me to see my father’s hardships and also makes me recall the period of his injury. I realize that I truly understand him!