Tai Ji Men Qigong Academy

Be my happy master

I made a fool of myself when I was at the junior high school.

One day, I found that there was a swelling on my head. It hurt when I touched it. I thought that my life was finished. I was having a brain tumor and my world would change into darkness all at once. Then, my classmate asked me when she saw me depressed. I told her what was bothering me. She laughed loud after seeing my scalp. It was just a pimple, not a tumor at all.

I often thought too much and had negative thoughts in brain. An ordinary thing would easily tumble me down to the bottom. In addition, I was a face-saving and demanding person who always asked for perfection. Other people with unintentional words would upset me for many days. Therefore, the idea of "happiness" was far away for me to grasp.

When I was home, I like to clean here and mop there. My husband and daughter often teased me as a maid in my own household. When I heard this, I felt bad and thought they were careless and clueless. Without offering any help, how could they treat me like this? When reading my daughter’s grade in math, I even wonder it was probably better for her to be a beggar who doesn’t have to know much about calculation and in the mean time can receive something from people. Moreover, I had two weaknesses that most women had as well: One is that I hate people associate me with the world of "old." The other is that I did not like to hear words like "fat" or "obese." After I was forty, these two words follow me like shadows which affected my mood. When I was in a bad mood, I would blame others or made an excuse for my early menopause. I never admitted that all these negative feelings came from my bad temper.

This year, my Shifu reminds me to learn to be happy, because happiness is a state of bliss. Being angry and having a bad temper would lose one’s mind and become stupid. So, I realized that I was nervous and tortured like in hell by my pursuit of perfection. Our mind will be free and ease like being in paradise when we look for happiness. Therefore, I decided to change my thoughts. I see doing the chores as taking the aerobic exercise. I also consider my husband and kid’s comment as a nice compliment, which means I am a good wife and a wise mother. When my child calls me "chubby", I will think it is an alternative praise for my good body shape. When my child fails in math, I think it in another way that she will become a rich person’s wife who simply needs to know how to use money in her future. Besides, it is quite convenient to pay by credit card. If she is not good in calculation, she still can have good life. Why should I worry?

Therefore, without a penny, simply changing our mind to good thoughts can lead to happiness. When I have good thoughts, I feel happy. I decided to be a master of happiness and live cheerfully every day. Instead of being controlled by my temper, I can now master it.